Friday, September 29, 2023

She doesn’t see me but I see her


Adeymius is a cultural-lifestyle, research writer, and journalist. His knack for storytelling and research can be found with 2 newspapers and a published novel. He is also the Editor-in-Chief for The Whistling Chronicle Newspaper and on-air personality for Retuned Radio with RWTC Media Group. His background training and experience is in communications, investigative journalism, magazine design and production, web development, cyber security, and programming. Despite his already useful talents, he is currently working towards a Ph.D. in communications and journalism. His hobbies include, scenic drives, mechanics, drawing, listening to music, playing his ukulele, movies, bowling, and camping.

Last Updated on April 13, 2023 by Adeymius

“Today, for sure, I’m going to ask her…I don’t know what to ask her.” My day starts with the usual, getting up, washing up, eating and so boring right I know. Let’s just skip the introductions and how I start my day. What I do want to say is that there’s this girl, and she’s in three of my classes. I make it a point to get to class super early just so that I can see her smile when she walks into the room and no, she’s not smiling at me either. Ok maybe I sound like a creeper or some weirdo but c’mon, if your crush was in the same class like you, you wouldn’t stare or look from time to time and feel giddy when they walk in the room? Exactly. So back to what I was saying before I was interrupted, rude, her name is Patricia.

I’ve had this crush on her for some time now, well for 3 years to be exact and I don’t know what to say. She’s super nice, sweet, cares for others and has the most beautiful hazel eyes I have seen, and, gets really good grades. She doesn’t seem to follow them in a crowd or the latest trends, she dresses nice and seems to be a classy type of gal, someone mom and dad would approve of. So if all is well why can’t I approach her right? I tried before but hesitated only to make myself look as if I was about to faint or something, super embarrassed and I never tried again.

Sometimes my friends like to play rugby matchmaker and push comes to shove and that may be fun and all to them, but not to me, I’m having a hard time with this and it means a lot. I’ve told my friends to stop pushing and to chill out you’re making me look, bad dude, all this looks childish. But of course, being the Neanderthals they are, making fire seems more exciting to them than an explanation of how I feel about her. Go figure.

I’ve asked other people, family, even, on how to approach this situation, and its great advice but I’m not great at conversations much less an introduction to start with. So really how does one do this? I think it’s that first step, you know, walking up to that person and saying hi, then what? Do we just stare at each other and pretend or do we communicate through some sort of telepathy? Should I dance and make her smile, do I tell a joke? What do I say, oh lord, I’m in trouble aren’t I? This isn’t easy for me, I have a better chance at explaining how I want my steak at a restaurant to a waiter than I do with talking to someone for the first time that I like. Why is this so hard, I mean they should have a class in High School that helps with this, seriously?

I see many of my friends go through girlfriends like choosing a new restaurant every few weeks and it’s disturbing, the way they are, I’m afraid others will look at me the same way because I hang out with these knuckleheads.

It’s the end of the school year now and I haven’t done anything to change my status, I did, however, send her some flowers for the birthday they were delivered to her…in class, and one with me. I never felt so much uneasiness, anxiety, happiness all at the same time. My advice is, don’t eat or drink anything before things like this, it’s not a good idea, trust me. I began to walk out of class after asking if I could be excused for the restroom, as I walked by her desk, it almost seemed like slow motion, our eyes met, and she gave this smile at me and said without sound…thank you. My eyes widened and my heart dropped as I walked outside into the hallway. I stood there for a moment and I wanted to cry, how did she know?

Today marks our 7th wedding anniversary and to this day she still makes me nervous, she’s the most beautiful woman I have ever laid eyes on.

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